the Whole No. 10: Cinnamon and Sugary
Cinnamon and Sugary
"Cinnamon and sugary
JC thought it was his job to make everyone feel better, all the time. Joey called him the group doctor, but Lance thought privately that it was more about JC's desire for his own comfort. It was still sweet of him to worry anyway, but most of the time there wasn't anything JC could do. Like about Justin.
"This is hard," he told JC when JC came up behind him and hugged him and asked, because it was hard, impossibly hard. He would look at Joey and see love and then, somewhere, out of the corner of his eye, he would see Justin, and everything happy would go away. It sucked, often and a lot. Sometimes, Lance thought it would be easier if he and Joey just forgot about it. He could think that; he just couldn't do it.
"It's worth it," JC murmured in his ear.
Lance smiled. Only JC would say that. Only JC would even bother to think that.
"Yeah," he said.
JC massaged his shoulders, rocking him back and forth gently. "I know you don't think so," he said. "But it is."
Lance laughed out loud at that. He loved JC, loved him with all of the heart he had left after Joey, but JC was too romantic for his own good. "Yeah, JC."
A long time ago, JC had been in love with Justin. JC had been in love with all of them at one time or another: Joey before Lance was even around, Justin in Europe, even Lance during the lawsuit. It never came to anything, except with Chris. It was just the way JC related to all of them, love, love, and more love. He was kind of a hippie freak that way. At any rate, the remnants of JC's love for Justin were this kind of generosity about his motives and feelings. He always gave Justin the benefit of the doubt.
JC ran his hands through Lance's hair. He looped his arms around Lance's neck and smooched his ear, decisively. Between JC and Chris and their newfound love of everybody, Lance had never been kissed so often since he was a baby. "I'll let you get back to work," he whispered in Lance's ear.
"Yeah?" Lance said. He tried to keep his voice casual, distant, but he couldn't stop the smile.